29 days into the year...

Just 29 days ago, most people were sitting in their rooms, coffee shops, kitchen, bathroom, or wherever they deemed appropriate to ponder on the New Year and the fruits it had in store for them. Many of those people, I reckon, made a lot of promises, lot of predictions, and yes, and a lot of resolutions. 29 days into the New Year, I wonder where these people are at in their year long resolutions. I tend not to make New Year resolutions because there are too many factors that go into it. I don’t want to put too much pressure on myself that if I happen not to deliver, then I am feeling all crabby. It’s not worth it to me. I did make two general statements though for this year; 1) I was going back to church and 2) I was going to stop using profanity by the end of the year.

While I have been faithful to both of my goals yet at times I find it so hard to do. Just like yesterday, I got to the office and believe me folks, I was feeling like crap. So I went into the kitchen and the coffee was not made. So, I made a remark to the secretary and I said, wow, on a day when I actually need some coffee to operate, it’s shocking that it was not made. Poor Margie, she quickly, Blake it shall be done shortly. I am sorry I didn’t make it. I wasn’t trying to tell the poor woman to make the coffee; I was only making a statement from what I had noticed. Being that she works in another department, her boss overheard my statement, and yelled; tell him to go make it himself. Now, I was ready to go into this old farts office and give her a piece of my mind. So I ignored the heffa and went back to my office to start off my day. A few minutes later, her boss came into my office to explain a few things. I wanted to tell her a few things instead I decided to send her an e-mail explaining what had taken place and why I think she’s over-reacting. So she and I got a lunch date next week and you know what, I am going to cancel on purpose. Lol.

Now i could have over-reacted myself and cuss her out for not minding her own business but I am trying to amicably deal with things now. It’s a New Year and just because the rest of the world makes a whole bunch of fucked up resolutions that they cannot live up to, it doesn’t mean I can’t stick to my two small ones. See, I just cussed, I should go back and delete it right, but I wouldn’t be honest with myself. I never said I was going to stop by the end of the month…see, it’s a work in progress.

So where are you at in your New Year resolutions? It’s been 29 days folks, have you been faithful? Are you still trying to lose that extra 50lbs by the end of the year? Have you been staying off them doughnuts? If your waist line is 20 and you’re trying to get it to 10 by the end of 08, you still have some time…I urge you to work on things that are feasible, don’t make all these lofty promises that you know danm well you cannot keep. Simply take baby steps, make monthly goals and let me know how you’re doing.

Let it be known...

This is an old one from 05.

In tears she was, when she placed the call to her mother. As she explained the situation and what led to this break down, her mother couldn't grasp why someone who is so successful in life, both in her private and professional life would just go through a mental break down. See, what her mother failed to realized is that sometimes all the success in the world cannot help you escape the pain of loneliness. The success and fame will not be the one tucking you in at night; success does not bring love, friendship and good vibration.


This young lady was suffering deep inside. For so long she had been with this man, they had kids, and because of their hectic schedule, making love to each other would be a planned activity. They had to look over their agenda's and re-work something in order to get some one-to one. Worst of all, they didn't even have the time to relay their feelings to each other. They ignored the fact that when it comes to feelings, one must be vocal and let your feelings be transparent. People can’t read minds… They neglected the ideals that had gotten together and the relationship was suffering because of it, and it eventually would lead to their demise.


Sometimes, we spend so much time in the office and we fail to remind our loved ones that we love and care about them. Whether it is the kids, the wife, the husband, our parents, our siblings, or whomever, we have to let them know. At the end of the day, those are the people who are internally suffering, if we claim to love and care about them, then, why not take a minute from our busy schedule and place that call.

Go ahead…make that phone call.

I fear for you Loo...

This piece is old…I wrote that back in June 05…it’s dedicated to my little brother…He still hasn’t changed. Boy I got love for the hommie. That’s my dude. I still fear for you though…


Time after time you seem to regress
not so sure if you've had time to address
all the issues which causes you stress
you need to wake up and not suppress
the changes will occur if you don't repress
instead of growing you seem to digress


You blame me for your lack of development (he still does…lol)
how could it be when you enjoyed being in the basement
I was always there for you even though I was away for school
when we would link up you always maintained everything was cool
you held a grudge against me for your lack of maturation
dude please, you were too busy masturbating
I recall the late night phone calls from my mother
wondering if you would come home but you ain't seem to bother
i got a better relationship with your father
and the preacher ain't even my father
how could that be Loo, you had so much potential (still do)
how you let these scumbags influence you
Though you moved in with me i still fear for you
i'm afraid one day they might call to identify you


these dudes you running with please dismiss them
when you're dead or in jail they won't even miss yah(you see what happened after you got arrested 07)
they done mistreat yah(left you hanging and you had to take the fall 07)
fuck the game, the hustle and the money man
I ain't got much but I’ll take care of you man
not for long 'till you get back on your feet man
ma dukes told me to look out for you man
though we're estrange brothers, i'll do that for you man
it ain't easy being who i am, so stop trying man
i don't care just be you and the world will accept you man
get that degree and make amend with yourself man
get you a job that will benefit you man
we can both move on up like the Jefferson’s man
make your dad proud cuz he done lost respect for u man
i know it's tough but i'll be there for you man
take your time and adjust to the world man
Ties and suits ain’t for everybody man (but they sure look good on me bro…lol)
thats my thing, sport your jeans and white t's man
the world is enough for the both of us man.


****Update****
Little man got arrested at his home soon after I moved to Florida. Apparently the Feds were camping out of his house for over a month. On the night they busted in, 10 of my brothers friends were in there and they all said the drugs and the weapons weren’t theirs. So my brother had to take the fall because it was his home. His closest dudes left him hanging even though the weapons belonged to them. My brother was actually asleep at the time. I was devastated when I heard the news but I could only do so much because I was now in a different state and I was dealing with my oldest brother situation that same weekend. See, my oldest, whom at the time I hadn’t seen since 2003, was coming to Florida to see me. He got in a car accident in Charlotte, North Carolina; it was so bad that they had to cut off one of his arms in order to save him. Both of these things happened the same weekend, and at the time I was planning my biggest event of 07. So I had a lot on my plate but we made it through. Both of my brothers are doing cool now. Little man ended up getting probation; he’s getting off that in a couple of months, so he’ll be partying with me in FL in no time. And my oldest brother is going through rehab right now. It’s a lot tougher for him but he’s a survivor. He’s going to make it.

I know sometimes I get on my brother’s case for being an asshole but I guess maybe I expect him to be somewhat like me because people expect him to be like me. But I guess to each his own and that’s the way life is supposed to be. Everyone has their own testimony…Hope this man can find some peace of mind now.

Love…Ain’t it something.

People often ask me about love and if I’ve ever been able to fully love without holding back. Back then my answer was always no but over the past 2 years I have been really committed, I’ve been honest, on point, dedicated, and very supportive. I have wholeheartedly fallen in love and because of that I am a better person. When I was first introduced to her, clearly I had my doubts. I didn’t like her heavy Haitian accent; I didn’t like her foul mouth, the way she would dress to certain events, I also didn’t like all the rumors that were out there about her, but I saw past that. I allowed myself to like her without passing any judgments because at the end of the day I wanted to treat her just like I would expect in return. Truth to be told, it was the best thing I could have done. Anyone who have come in contact with me know that I have never hidden my love, I often drive around town with her and people would ask me why I am with her, or why am I all up in her like that but those who question me can’t possibly understand the debt of my love. They are incapable of understanding this union, it’s a perfect marriage.

In the words of the good old book, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you”.

I meet a lot of older Haitians and they often would say, you’re such a nice guy, you seem educated, and why are you with this chick? Don’t you think she would taint your reputation? Do you honestly think she would ever be your equal? How do you introduce someone like that to your parents? I mean gosh, they would ask me all these foolish questions. Sometimes I feel so bad for her because she be right next to me when they ask all these stupid questions. But one thing they often tend to forget is that being intellectual or educated has nothing to do with love; her past isn’t my past so no it won’t taint my reputation, matter of fact, what reputation are they referring to? So how do I introduce her to my parents, well, she’s been introduced and she is well liked. My parents only reservation is that people will judge me base on who I choose to love but you know what though, I don’t really give a flying duck. Those who judge me or her are the ones who never really took the time out to really understand us. They have never taking a second to listen to her stories, her pain, her plights, her journey, and her sufferings.

I lover her and regardless of your sentiments towards her, I remain unfazed.

I love Creole Hip Hop.

The Cost of Fame...

In an era when superstar athletes are making so much money for their contribution to a franchise, one has to wonder what it is doing to the average players who will never see the $300 million contract Alex Rodriguez has just signed or the $30 million per year Shaquille O’Neal was making or even the $40 million Lebron James signed with Nike when he was just barely 18. The average athlete knows that in order to cash in on his or her talent, he/she will need to have one great season and for that they will do anything. In the case of Marion Jones, a beautiful African American woman, very educated, well articulated, full of grace and charisma, she was the face of track and field, a sport that rarely gets on the 11pm Sports Center highlights, a sport that athletes has to rely on sponsors and other contributions in order to live comfortably. Marion Jones took a very simple road. The road that Robert Frost wrote about in his highly publicized poem, the road less traveled. Indeed, she took it, got paid because of it, and denied (under oath) ever using it, and now she’s spending 6 months in jail because of it.

I often think back to all the glory and how she became America’s darling at the 2000 Olympics. I think about her speeches, the front page magazine covers, the ESPN highlights, the humility she displayed after crushing the field, and then to find out that she was being aided by some type of steroid, it kind of made me wonder. I myself was somewhat of a superstar athlete back in high school but I lacked one thing. Speed. I was great on the soccer field with the ball at my feet yet when I didn’t have the ball a team could really take me out of the game. So I started thinking back to that glorious summer after I made the all star team and my teammate Walter came over to my house and he said Blake, I have something that could help you increase your speed. Now, Walter wasn’t physically in great shape. He was a fat obnoxious Mexican lad but he had a great sense of humor and he was feisty. When he offered me this drug, my mind took me back to all the practices and games that Walter had been involved in and truth be told he wasn’t great or at least he wasn’t better than me in any of them. So I passed on. I ended up making the All-Star team on my own merits yet I’ve often wondered how many more goals I could have scored that season (27), how many more assists (10) I could have had and how many more groupies I could have gotten (?) or even how many newspapers or local reporters would have covered my games and lastly how many scouts would have deemed me one of the better players in America.

O, the choices we make!!!! Now that I look at Marion Jones, a famous athlete who’s going to spend 6 months in jail for something she could have easily avoided. As she came out of the court room on Friday she said that she hopes other athletes will learn from her mistake. So I wonder, was she referring to lying, taking steroids, or getting caught. The money and fame is so tempting that one would do anything to cash in. Growing up on a modest street in Maryland, we had super star athletes on my block…Dominique Dawes, Steve Francis, Jason Miskiri to name a few. But I was also famous on this very same block, not just as a super athlete but an Honor roll student and I take a lot of pride in that. Thank God I had the proper senses to ignore Walter and go my own way. I was never meant to be a super star athlete; I am doing exactly what God destined me to do. I am chasing my dreams and not someone else’s.

Whatever it is you are doing right now, make sure it’s exactly what you want to do…The cost of fame is crazy. It could cost you an arm and a leg, and sometimes it can cost you your freedom.

Happy Sunday folks. Go Cowboys!!!

08 is here...WASSUP READERS...

08 is here…and I am officially back to full swing. What’s good folks? Thanks a bunch to those of you who reached out via e-mail or MySpace throughout 07. I’ve been blessed…and 08 is the year of fullness of blessings for me and hopefully for y’all.

Happy New Years to you all and stay tuned because I am going to make things very interesting in the next few weeks. The Presidential Elections are fast approaching and Obama is making a lot of noise so we’ll see how Clinton reacts. Don’t get your hopes to high though folks, Obama hasn’t won anything but the Caucus, yet it’s a start. So stay tuned for my views on that and many more political related topics.

Next thing on the list…I hope by the end of 08 there will be no cuss words on my blog. Folks, I am trying to keep it out when I am here relaying my thoughts to you folks. If I can’t use it at work then why do it on my blog, my private sanctuary. I know the kids that I tutor would have a problem if they were to visit the blog, so I am going to try very hard this year and hopefully by the end of 08, there won’t be anymore shit, fuck, danm, hoes, bitch, etc. Ok, I had to get them demons out for a second.

I am sure y’all remember the nookie story right? Well, homeboi has been getting permanent nookie now. He still hasn’t updated his myspace page but he’s getting consistent booty. So big ups to me and my dudes in the 202 for hooking up this homeboi. He promised to take me out the next time I go home, so we’ll see how that goes. Y’all already how cheap Haitians are, so we’ll see where he takes me.

Speaking of cheap…well, let me write a completely new entry for this one…so look out for the cheap homeboi entry…that should be very interesting. Also, you can stay updated by entering your e-mail add in the provided link and each time i upload a new entry, you will be the first to know.

So am I missing anything??? Thanks again to all of you…I hope you make this your year. I don’t know what your struggles were last year but I pray that you have a prosperous year. God Bless…

This one is for you…and you know who you are missy… We used to e-mail each other on a regular basis, what happened??? One second we’re cool peoples and the next minute you disappear. Well, I miss your e-mails. I know you’re not writing because of what you did but I am letting you know right now, I am way over it. I’ve moved on shawty. It’s a new year. Holla @ ur boi. My advice is still free luv. I miss you.

This one is for God...

A special friend shared this piece with me...

Hi Bleky,
Lately, you have been on my thoughts and this morning something is prompting me to share the following with you. Best wishes for 2008. Live it Up.

This one is for God
I want to write a poem, but
I know it will not fit that description,
either it be too long or
not formatted to be called a poem.
So I’ll just express my thoughts.
I am nothing, but a stubborn child,
But He refused to turn around,
Never turn His back on me,
Always there when I need Him.
Because of His love for me, I am better.
I am afraid that I’ll never be what He wants me to be
Or who He wants me to be.
I am a naïve, clueless child among liars,
Dealing with disappointments, confusions,
Jalousie, anger, hurt, pain,
How it is impossible to pray sometimes.
But in my darkest hour I worship Him… my Lord
I wonder sometimes, how could He love someone like me?
I was having a hard time believing, accepting that,
But now I believe and accept,
No longer frightening to think about it
I just have to make a few adjustments
Now that I am in a relationship with Him
It’s no longer a Him or me thing. It is US, our time, our space.
God, this is so long over due
Nothing or better yet I can’t think
Of anyone that fit the picture
I’ve tried to paint. And nothing I’ve written
Come close to what I feel for you, no words
Can express, no arrangement of them
Lord, I want You, I want to be with You,
I want to be where You are,
Living daily in Your presence. I will die for you,
With you, die to live with you.
My mind is fill with thoughts mostly about US.
How much I don’t want to let You down again.
I am officially pledging myself to You
I know we have been through, but in the end,
The pain, trials, tribulations was preparation for
Me to understand how much You mean to me.
I don’t ever want to take You for granted,
I want the world to know that I live for You,
Breathe for You, I do everything for You.
I am patiently waiting for the day, where we
Can be together for ever –
I wait for the day to look at You, hug You,
Kiss You, dance with You, live with You
In the waiting, I breathe, I live, I dream for that day!

Be Blessed

The portrayal of Black Women

Commentary
TV still stereotyping black women
Look at Jerry Springer, 'Supernanny' or 'Grey's Anatomy' for characters with no balance at all.
By Orville Lloyd Douglas
Join a discusssion at The Fishbowl

Chances are you've watched her, the dark-skinned black woman with the weave and the polished clothes. She may have a couple of master's degrees or a doctorate. It doesn't matter because when you see her on TV your immediate perception is to hate her. She's the woman that people laugh about in private, the one they call the "angry black bitch."

Are all black women really like this? Of course not. Yet television networks, which control the images presented to the public, perpetuate these stereotypes.

Look at the Jerry Springer or Maury Povich shows. Young black women are presented as sluts, whores, welfare cheats and bad single mothers who don't know who their children's fathers are.

Contrast that with the ABC-TV show Supernanny, where Jo Frost visits the homes of white women who are invariably good mothers. They bake cookies, cook, clean, love their husbands and children, and live in big, beautiful, spacious houses. These white women live the perfect "American" dream. Has Frost ever visited a black middle-class family with children in suburbia?

Another stereotype is the sassy, overweight black woman.

On ABC-TV's The View, it was Star Jones Reynolds' job to be the Aunt Jemima of American television. However, once Reynolds got married and lost the weight, mainstream America hated her. She was fired, apparently because she no longer wanted to be the punch line.

Of course, the stereotype goes beyond live television or reality TV shows. On the ABC drama Grey's Anatomy, Chandra Wilson plays Dr. Miranda Bailey, who is known as the "Nazi." Bailey is overweight, confrontational, unattractive and a loudmouth. She's also the only black female doctor on the show. By contrast, the star, Ellen Pompeo, is white, young, feminine, fit and attractive.

On the CBS show Close to Home, Kimberly Elise's character Maureen Scofield is the "black widow." She's a lawyer who is single, bossy and aggressive. By contrast, Jennifer Finnigan plays Annabeth Chase, who is loving, vulnerable and feminine. She illustrates the difficulty of balancing a career and a happy marriage.

Some see talk-show host Oprah Winfrey as a positive image, yet she is just another stereotype: the faithful black "mammy." She's the "nurturer" who ignores the friction between black and white women in order not to upset her white female audience.

The few positive images of black women on television are relegated to the fringes. On the UPN show Girlfriends, Joan, Toni, Lynn and Maya are intelligent, attractive, educated black women with successful careers. The show is one of the few devoted to the young black woman's experience. The only other one that comes close, Half and Half - also on UPN - may not return.

Black feminist Audre Lorde wrote in her 1984 book Sister Outsider that white women falsely assume they share a "global sisterhood" with black women. You wouldn't know that from watching television. White women are consistently presented in a more favorable light. There is no balance. Too often, black women are depicted as devils and witches while white women are saints.

It is disingenuous of television to ignore diversity and present such a biased view. There are rich stories and experiences about black women that need to be told. Directors, producers, writers and network executives need to reflect reality.

As I read this piece, I am somehow delighted that someone has decided to step up and convey this message to the general public. Bottom line is, we can blog all we want about certain things but until those with higher power do something, it’s as if we’re wasting our time. But I totally agree with this article. Black women are the heartbeat of a family yet they’re constantly being attacked or stereotyped for the mistakes of a few. I find a lot of black women to be very intellectual, logical and level headed.

At the end of the day, these white executives are always going to put crap like that on television. Those that control the airwaves are interested in what's best for their needs rather than a defined and diverse cross section of opinions and information. BET has been going through a big change lately and I expect that it will continuously improve in trying to remedy what they used to do a few years ago. I understand that there’s a higher demand for negativity yet these bad images are corrupting the minds of our young ones.

So far I think TV One has the right formula and hopefully they will continue to be a role model in the black community. The majority of their shows are about positive things that will empower young women to better themselves. A lot of execs are totally against this because they to fill our young one’s mind with their own vision of the ghetto woman shaking her butt to a song calling her nothing but a bunch of B's and H's. I for one thing it’s time for Black America to wake up and start making better decisions as to what they watch on television. Nowadays I feel ashamed at times to even go to the mall where all these young girls, barely in puberty, walking around in outfits that makes them look like they belong on the street corners. They want to act mature and have these so called boyfriends, do grown-up acts and end up on drugs, get pregnant, or get involved in an abusive relationship. This is what they see on television and believe it is normal. It is not what our black leaders fought and died for. It isn’t. Time to wake up folks!!!!


Your thoughts?