My Blog...Mi Casa...Su Casa

I am the first and last of my kind....

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Taking Responsibilities

Should I be held accountable for missing you? Or should I just say, it was my choice to love you, so the cost of that love is my burden and my burden alone?

I mean, look at it this way, how can I take responsibility for you leaving? I know you claimed that I wasn’t enough for you, but is that really my fault? Last I checked I gave it my all, so you cannot say I didn’t try hard enough. What else was there?

Ok, I get it. Now I should take responsibility for being hurt? Or maybe I should have managed my emotions? Or is it because I loved you unconditionally and allowed you to go in and out as you pleased?

How can I take responsibility for all the mess you put me and my family through? What do I say to acknowledge the part I played in this?

Dad, why can’t I just blame you for this???

2 comments:

  1. I do understand where you are coming from. For years I yearned to have a normal relationship with my father. Although he was there when I was younger; emotionally it was hell. I've realized that yearning for normal relationship with him is wishful thinking. He is great man, but not a great father. He is what he is and accepts our relationship. Actually, we've gotten closer since I gave up trying to change him, or mold him into what I want.

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